Cpa at last. Yesterday, I was so ecstatic about it...wanna tell the whole world that I passed and I made it.  Today, I'm just tired and I wanna rest.  Tomorrow, I'll have to think about work. I passed but then so what.. life doesnt end there. It's the same vicious cycle of having a goal, struggling to reach that goal, reaching that goal, and then aiming for something else. But needless to say, I am happy. I am grateful...really grateful to a lot of people; my mom and dad who gave me the reason to really wanna pass that darned exam; my sister who taught me lessons I have long forgotten about; my brother who constantly tells me, in the cheesiest way imaginable (erkkk) that I can do it; my friends who remind me everytime that I  am smart (heck, I am. hahaha. pardon me, but I was told that once you pass the exam, you earn the license to boast. lol); and paw2x of course, who never doubted my abilities, not for a second. But if there's one soul out there who deserve my sincere and utmost gratitude, it's my Creator, of course...He who decides our fate.

I hoped to pass but wasn't counting on it. I guess that's what people referred to as "hoping for the best while preparing for the worst." But I must say, no amount of preparation could stop your tears from falling if you failed. I should know. I've been there. I've done that. And it almost felt like hell rose and ate me whole. Lol.

I dreamt about that day for 6 months. I imagined what I was going to do upon hearing the good news. But yesterday,  irony upon irony, i cried. I cried while going down the escalator at SM. I cried because I was horrified by the fact that I needed to enroll for a refresher course..that and the fact that my dad would be gravely disapppointed. I thought I didnt pass. I was told I didnt pass. But they were wrong. Dead wrong. Thanks she and dave for telling me otherwise. Lol. But it was really difficult to be happy for myself because I was saddened by the fact that not all of my friends passed. I wanna tell them it's okay but I should know that it isn't.

The most important preparation in any exam, I guess, is one's faith...prayers, prayers and if you could stilll manage it, more prayers. Hehe...  Because if God  gets bored with hearing the same petition for 6 months, surely, He'd make your wish happen. No doubt about that. But  if He doesnt, then maybe you did not pray hard enough, or you did not tell Him that you want it so bad. Or perhaps, He's postponing your happiness for another six months. Like they always say, it's all in God's time.

It's funny because I stil feel that I didnt deserve to pass. I know I did not study as hard as everyone did. I took the exam without reviewing for two subjects. But I believed I would pass although I kept that to myself. And like what Dave concluded last night, optimism helps.  It helps an awful lot. Of course nothing beats effort. Optimism sans effort and prayers is pointless.

I wanna say kudos to the new CPAs. Great opportunities await you...and me. Hehe... And to my friends who have yet to take the exam, remember that it's all in God's time. I'll be scanning picpa.com.ph for your names this October. :)

Meanwhile, cheers!

P.S. I need a job. Lol. :)

Sad, isnt it? that for every 10 women in this world, there's only 1 man (gays included). This probably explains why some girls go after men which are already taken or worse, married. And suddenly, the world has become a circus of men cheating on their girls, girls cheating on their men. If you happen to be at the losing end (think victim, girl), your sorry ass would just have to rationalize that men are polygamous by nature. Some would say that the only person to blame would be your man who cheated on you. But i think otherwise. After all, it takes two to tango. Some sorry ass bitches plead innocent. Some would just shrug the whole escapade off with utter disregard for the damages caused to other people's lives. But some would go beyond what we would normally consider as tolerable...picture this, ur man trying to desperately explain to you that he is not guilty and this sorry ass loser (the other girl i mean) hurling nasty words at you through text...saying she wants your man and she's looking forward to the challenge and blah blah blah... Poor thing. (is your thumb sore from all the texting? hahaha. didnt even read them you stupid girl.) Honestly though, I can't help but feel sorry for your stupid ass. It's not easy being alone. But alone, unwanted and desperate is a different thing altogether. Do you not feel embarrassed chasing guys who do not want you? (you call that challenge, i call that undignified behavior) I pity you. Yes you---sick desperate girl. Do you know what a pastime is? It's that something (in your case, someone) that occupies your SPARE time.  THat's what you are, a pastime. Isn't it degrading? Do you know what most people would say about pastime girls? think... low life, uneducated, self-serving scum! i'd like to add promiscuous but uhm, i guess you already get the point. Nobody wants you so you lust after someone else's man.  You should feel sorry for yourself because u're being used to gratify this man's need to be with his TRUE girl.
So mickey mouse (or whoever the hell you are), GO AHEAD! Chase my man like you said you would. I hope you have a blast doing just that. Really, I wish you well. After all, the most you could ever be is a PASTIME, a SIDELINE--like others would call the likes of you. But you know what, to me you'll be JUST this---a low life scum. Call me whatever you want (i remember you did call me bitch). The bottomline is, he doesnt want you. I'll still have the last laugh you POOR POOR THING!
i'd like to believe that i am not affected. but human beings, after all, do get hurt. but beware silly girl. Karma will eventually find its way to you...bite you in the ass when you're not looking. hahaha... peace! :)

I deliberately missed class this morning and this afternoon, i skipped the latter part of the discussion. Hahaha... A part of me finds relief in the fact that I would not have to endure yet another hour of boring accounting lessons and mushy mushy antics from our almost balding prof and yet the other part wants to go back to the classroom lest the prof notices my (and my seatmate's) absence and lecture about respect in front of everybody. Man, that would be awfully embarrassing. But here I am (and my seatmate) in an internet cafe near the review center, trying to pass up time so that it wouldn't be so obvious to family (and others) that I (we) skipped classes.

And whilst I'm having the time of my life laughing at my escapade, my conscience tells me that karma is true and I could only hope against all hopes that it does not strike on the day of the exam. Otherwise, I'll be damned or dead, to be more specific. :)